“So how did …” Zan moves infinitely faster than me. He had gently pushed past Miranda to grab me by the collar, shocking me to no end, and jam me violently against the door. “Fake,” he hissed at me. “You’re being fake. What happened to you…?” My brother knows me better than anyone. It honestly had never occurred to me that he would figure it out so quickly, or figure it out at all. And realization lit up his blue-grey eyes as he released me. My body felt weak, and it took all I had to keep myself pinned in place on that door before I fell over. Half my mind willed him not to speak, and the other half begged him to let this painful secret out. My twin brother Zan had become my voice box once more. “Miranda…Dan loves you too.” Her eyes were already wide from Zan’s sudden attack, and now her mouth formed into a perfect ‘o’. She smiled suddenly, but her eyes were black pools of mystery. I can never tell what she’s thinking sometimes. “Love? Love like… ‘sister’ love or ‘friend’ love or…”. We grew closer as friends, and my denial of my feelings, made it possible for intimacy to grow between us. Jeb called in sick one day, leaving a voice mail, which didn't raise any concerns. But late that night, I heard the sounds of someone stumbling around in the church foyer around 9 pm. I investigated carefully. I found Jeb, and I could smell the booze on his breath from six feet away. He was drunk and singing loudly, and almost falling down with each unsteady step. I rushed over, put one of his arms around me and helped him to the church office and let him collapse into a chair. I tried to talk to him but he was far too drunk to be either coherent or remorseful. Remorse might have to wait until the morning. I let him dry out awhile, knowing he was in no shape to walk home. When he said he wanted to leave, I kept him seated, and kept him talking to me. But finally he got up and announced he was walking home. I didn't want to see him stumble into the road in front of an oncoming.
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